


The Lonely Hearts

by ellerabe



Category: American Horror Story, American Horror Story: Cult, American Horror Story: Roanoke
Genre: Bisexual Female Character, Bisexuality, Canon Lesbian Character, Domestic Fluff, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Relationships, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Humor, Fluff and Smut, Lesbian Character, Lesbian Sex, Shelby has a kid, Shelby lived, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-05
Updated: 2019-06-19
Packaged: 2020-04-08 13:13:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,617
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19107808
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ellerabe/pseuds/ellerabe
Summary: A Roanoke/Cult crossover. Shelby survived Return to Roanoke: Three Days in Hell. She moves to Brookfield Heights in hopes to restart her life, and escape her past.





	1. Therapy

Shelby took a deep breath before she turned the handle to her new therapist's office. She chewed on her bottom lip as her eyes scanned the room. She saw a brunette sitting in the waiting room, who was staring at her phone intently. She stared at her for a moment, almost mistaking her for Audrey, but she knew it was impossible – the woman was dead.

She walked up to the front desk and signed herself in.

"You're a little early." The receptionist said. "There's still one more patient in front of you."

"That's fine," Shelby replied before walking over to the sofa opposite of the woman and sat down.

"Do I know you from somewhere?" the brunette woman asked.

"Uh... possibly...?" Shelby said nervously. It made her extremely anxious when people recognized her.

"Have you ever come to the butchery?" the other woman asked.

"Butchery?" Shelby asked with furrowed brows.

"Never mind." The other woman waved it off and returned back to her phone.

The door to the left side of the room opened up, and a tall, dark-haired man stepped out. "Allison."

The brunette woman stood up, shoved her phone into her purse, and walked over to the door, following the doctor inside.

Forty-five minutes passed before the door reopened. Shelby looked over and looked at the two for a moment.

"I'll be with you in a moment, Shelby." The doctor said.

"Okay," she nodded softly.

The brunette – Allison – looked at her for a moment before it dawned on her. "You're Shelby Miller, from that show!"

"Uh... yeah..." Shelby said awkwardly before looking down. She bit her lip as the other woman walked toward her.

"Sorry, you probably get that a lot."

"Not really, actually. At least not anymore." Shelby said.

"Wait, I thought you died?"

Shelby looked up at the other woman. "I almost did. I, uh, no one said anything after the show ended." She explained. "I didn't want anyone to know..."

"I'm sorry," Allison said again. "I'm Ally, by the way." She extended out her hand with a small, inviting smile.

This was the first person who seemed friendly towards Shelby, besides the people at the daycare center, since she had moved. It gave her a small sense of hope for the town. She shook the other woman's hand and smiled back at her. "It's nice to meet you."

Ally smiled before taking her hand back. She dug through her purse before handing over a card. "This is a card for the butchery I was talking about. Stop by any time."

"Thanks," Shelby said softly.

Before the brunette could reply, the door opened again. "Shelby, you can come in now."

"See you around." Ally said before walking toward the exit.

The blonde stood from the couch and walked to the door and stepped inside the large office. She looked around the room, observing her surroundings. She saw the man already sitting down, gesturing toward two seats in front of him. She sat down, looking down at her lap, and not up at him.

"I'm Doctor Vincent, or you can simply call me Vincent." He said.

"Okay," Shelby said.

"Is this your first time coming to therapy?"

"No," she said as she finally looked up at him. "After I lost Rachel, my first baby, Matt and I went to therapy. It wasn't individual therapy though." She explained.

"Would you say it was a good experience?"

"I guess." Shelby shrugged. "It didn't last very long. It was only maybe four or five sessions before we moved, and we never saw anyone else after that."

"Did it resolve any issues between you and Matt?"

"There weren't any issues between us at the time. I felt guilty for what happened, as did he. It helped a bit with that, but..." she looked back down, swallowing her emotions. She wiped her tears away before they could fall. "I still feel that way sometimes."

"Shelby, you cannot blame yourself for something like that."

"Yeah..." she sighed.

"I've looked through your past records," Vincent said, changing the subject. "I see you were diagnosed with PTSD a little over two years ago. You've had on and off depression symptoms for years, and after you gave birth you suffered from post-partum depression. You've taken anti-depressants and anti-anxiety medication. Are you currently taking anything?"

"I take Trazadone and Valium."

"Both for sleep?"

"I take the Valium if I have a panic attack," Shelby said softly.

"How often would you say you take one?" Vincent asked as he started writing all this down.

"At least once a day..."

"What sets you off?" he questioned.

Shelby took a deep breath. "Anything... sometimes it's random, and sometimes – especially since I've started to unpack things – memories."

"What kind of memories?"

"Of Matt... of what happened."

"At the house?"

"Yes." Shelby nodded.

Vincent continued to write for a moment. "For you, what do you want to see happen with your therapy and medication?"

"I'd like to not feel like I don't want to sleep because of the nightmares I have."

"Anything else?"

"I don't want to have a panic or anxiety attack every time I see something or think of something that brings back a memory. I just want to be normal again... I want to be there for my baby..." Shelby sighed as she looked down again. "I feel like I'm not being the best mother I can be for her."

"No one is normal, Shelby. As for your daughter, I'm sure you're trying your best." He said.

"I know... I am..." she sighed again. "But I mean back to myself. Back to who I was before all this shit happened."

"What do you do to help your anxiety or mood?" he asked.

"Yoga... playing with Marie. She keeps me occupied most of the time."

"How old is Marie?" Vincent asked.

"Almost two," Shelby said with a small smile.

"That's a very special age."

"It is."

"Okay, besides Marie, you said you like yoga. Find somewhere in town and start going. I want to see you again in a week. During this week, I want you to try and unpack your house or apartment, find a yoga studio and roam the town. Okay?"

"Okay," Shelby nodded.

They wrapped up the session, and Shelby started to drive to the daycare center where she had dropped Marie off for the first time. It always made her anxious to leave Marie anywhere that wasn't with family. She parked her car outside the building before heading inside.

As Shelby stepped inside, she heard a squeal from the other side of the room before she saw Marie run straight to her.

"Mama!" Marie smiled as she wrapped her tiny arms around legs.

"Hi, baby." Shelby smiled as she leaned down to pick up her daughter.

"She was good as soon as you left." Madalyn – one of the caretakers at the daycare, a shorter, redhaired woman – said as she walked over to Shelby. She handed the mother her daughter's bag.

The mother smiled as she caressed her daughter's dark curls before taking the bag. "Really? Were you a good girl for Madalyn?"

"Mhm," Marie nodded before nestling her head into Shelby's neck. "Miss ya."

"Awe, baby..." Shelby pouted. "Thank you for getting us signed up so fast."

"Of course. I know it's hard as a single mother." Madalyn said with a small smile. "Are you bringing her by again tomorrow?"

"Possibly. I need to go to a job interview and run by some other places." Shelby said. 

The other woman nodded. "Okay, we'll see you tomorrow, Marie." She said softly.

"Buh-bye," Marie said softly as she waved at Madalyn.

"Ready to go shopping with Mommy?" Shelby asked as she started to walk to the door.

"Yeah!"

Shelby smiled as she unlocked the car, and placed Marie in her car seat in the back. She moved to the front and got into the driver's side. She drove to the grocery store near the apartment.

She got Marie out of the back after she parked. She put the girl into the front of a basket before heading inside. They gathered the essentials, food, Marie's pull-ups, and a box of hair dye.

"Waz dat?" Marie asked as she stared at the box.

"It's going to change Mama's hair."

"Ooh!" The little girl giggled. "How?"

"It's going to change the color," Shelby explained as they walked down the candy aisle.

"Mine?" Marie asked as she put her small hand on the top of her head.

Shelby nodded with a small smile. "Just like yours, baby girl."

Marie giggled again before pointing at some Dum-Dum suckers. "Mama!"

"Baby, that's sugar. You know you can't have a lot sugar." Shelby said.

Marie pouted as she crossed her arms. "Pwease!"

Shelby sighed before grabbing the bag to see how much sugar was in one bag. "Okay, just only one a day." She said as she placed the bag into the cart.

"Yay!" the small girl squealed.

Shelby smiled as she walked them to the front of the store to check out.

After getting her bags, Shelby made her way to the car. She put Marie and the bags in before heading straight home. She made herself and Marie dinner. The two sat in front of the TV as they ate.

After dinner, Shelby gave Marie her nightly bath and read her almost a whole book before she finally fell asleep. Once she knew Marie was down for the night she went into the small bathroom and started the process of dying her hair. After a 45-minute wait, she took a shower to wash the dye away. Once she dried it, she saw it was a medium brown, which was a close color to Marie's hair. She smiled before heading to her bedroom to get ready for bed and take her pills.

As she waited for her nighttime pills to kick in, she decided to unpack the rest of her bedroom. After nearly every box was broken down, and every piece of clothing was put away, Shelby fell down in her bed. She let out a heavy sigh as her eyes closed. 

"One day at a time," she told herself.

 


	2. The Butchery

Shelby woke up to her alarm blaring loudly. She groaned as she reached over to turn it off. She glanced at the time, signing when she saw 6:30 A.M.

She got out of bed and went straight to the next bedroom. She peeked inside to see Marie still asleep. The mother was thankful for this as she walked to the kitchen to start on breakfast and some morning tea. She made them both a smoothie, cut them up a banana and made some oatmeal. Just as she set everyone on the table, she could hear rustling sounds from down the hall.

Shelby made her way into her daughter's bedroom, turning on the nightlight. She saw Marie sucking her thumb as she peeked up at her.

"Hey, baby girl. Are you ready to get up?"

"Nuh-uh." The girl mumbled.

"But I made your favorite!"

"'Moothie?"

Shelby smiled as she nodded. She walked further into the room and reached down to pick Marie up. "Peanut butter and banana."

"Yay!" Marie said sleepily. "Potty."

"Okay, baby," Shelby said before walking to the bathroom. "Thank you for telling me." She said as she helped Marie use the restroom and then wash her hands.

"Welcomes." Marie smiled softly. She looked up at Shelby and her eyes went wide. "Mama, ya hairs!"

Shelby chuckled softly. "I know, baby! Do you like it?" She asked.

"Mhm!" The girl nodded. "Like mine." She said as she placed her hand on top of her brown curls. 

"Just like yours, baby girl!" Shelby smiled again. She knew her hair would never really be like Marie's – the girl's hair was much coarser than her own, and her curls were tighter, nearly impossible to straighten out.

"Like it." Marie smiled before running to the kitchen.

"Baby! No running." Shelby said as she followed after her daughter.

"Mama, I hungwy!" The girl stated as she climbed into her chair.

"I am too, baby," Shelby said as she sat down. She handed Marie her sippy cup, which was full of the smoothie she had made. "Drink up."

Marie took the cup and started to drink. "Mm, yummy."

"That's good. You need to fill up that tummy before you go to daycare."

Marie pouted as she shoved a piece of banana into her mouth. "Why go?"

"Because Mama needs to find to go find a job. I need one so I can make money. That way I can feed you." Shelby explained softly before eating some of the oatmeal in her bowl.

"Okay." Marie nodded. "I like Mad-line."

Shelby smiled softly. "That's good, baby girl. Did you like any of the other kids?"

"Hmm..." Marie paused to sip on her drink. "Mad-line baby girl." She said.

"That's great, baby." Shelby smiled. She knew Madalyn's daughter was three, and that they were close in age.

After breakfast, Shelby got dressed in yoga pants and a sweater, and helped Marie into a pair of overalls and tennis shoes. Shelby carries her daughter downstairs, put her into the backseat, and drove to the daycare. Dropping her off seemed easier than the day before, which she thanked the Gods for.

After a successful drop-off, Shelby headed to the first stop of the day, a yoga studio she had found the address of on her phone the night before. If it was a bust, she had two more places on her list. Not only was she trying to find a place to go to for classes, but possibly one where she could work at, hopefully, part-time for the time being.

After Shelby parked her car, she grabbed her purse and saw the card that Ally had given her a few days ago. She thought to herself that maybe she would stop there between checking out places for lunch.

She stepped out of the car and headed inside the yoga studio. It seemed promising so far. When she checked it out online, it had been the highest rated one in town.

She spotted a bleached blonde, young woman behind the counter, and walked over to her with a small smile.

"How can I help you, ma'am?" she asked.

"I was thinking about signing up." Shelby started with.

"Okay," the woman smiled before looking through a stack of papers. "What's the best schedule for you?" she asked as she handed a clipboard over.

Shelby scanned the paper for a second. "I'm not sure yet... I'm new to town, and I'm still looking for a job, and I have a 22-month-old."

"We have some openings... what's your background like?"

"I owned my own yoga studio in L.A. before moving here," Shelby told the woman.

The bleached blonde smiled. "Let me go grab my boss." She said before getting up.

Shelby nodded. She waited a few minutes before the young woman came back with an older, shorter, thin, brunette mixed with grey-haired woman.

"Brandy tells me you owned your own place in L.A. and you're looking for a job?"

"Yes, ma'am," Shelby said softly.

"Come back to my office. We can talk there."

Shelby followed the woman down a hall. On the way they passed four yoga rooms, each one was in use from the looks of it. When they reached the office, the woman took a seat behind a desk and motioned for Shelby to sit across from her, and she did.

"I'm Elizabeth, by the way."

"It's lovely to meet you. I'm Shelby."

"Do you mind me asking why you left your studio?"

"I took a break for something else, and then I ended up having a baby. By the time I came back, my manager was doing such a great job that I sold it over to her. I moved here with the money and needed a new start." Shelby explained.

"Okay," Elizabeth smiled, nodding. She turned in her seat to grab a file of paper. "How old is your child now?"

"Almost two."

The older woman smiled more. "That's a tricky but good age... here's an application. If you can, put the number of your old manager or for the studio. I'll give them a call sometime today or tomorrow. I don't see why I wouldn't hire you, so after you fill this out, I'll get back to you within a week."

"Okay, thank you." Shelby smiled.

The woman handed Shelby a pen and let her be as she filled out the paper.

Shelby wrote down her maiden name instead of Miller since she was planning on changing it soon. She wrote down the number of her assistant manager and everything else that was needed before handing it back over.

"Alright, Miss..." the woman looked down at the paper. "Darling, we'll get back to you within a week if not sooner."

"Okay, thank you again," Shelby said as she stood up.

Elizabeth showed her out and shook her hand.

Shelby smiled before walking back to her car. She felt like it was a very successful start. She didn't feel the need to go anywhere else unless she didn't hear from them within the week.

So, she took the card Ally gave her and put the address into her phone's GPS. She drove straight there and headed inside. A host greeted her at the door with a smile. She handed her a menu and led her to a booth near the kitchen.

As Shelby scanned the menu, she started to wonder what to get. There were too many options on the list, they all sounded so good, and she couldn't make up her mind.

She saw the kitchen door open, and Ally walked out with a platter in one hand, and a bottle of wine in the other. She watched as the other brunette walked over to a table of woman and set everything down. She saw Ally walking back her way, and their eyes met.

"Shelby! You finally made it." The other women smiled as she walked over to her.

"Yeah," Shelby smiled softly.

"I like the hair."

"Thanks. I thought I needed something new."

"It suits you well." Ally grinned. "What are you getting?"

"I'm not sure yet. There are too many things to choose from. They all sound so good."

Ally took the seat across from Shelby. "Well, I'd say the steak is the best, but a lot of people come here for the burgers. They say they're the best in town. With the steak, I think the potatoes and onions are the best side, and for the burger, the homemade fries are my favorite."

"They both sound incredible," Shelby said before biting her lip as she looked back down at the menu.

"Well, I could get you both, and you can try, and see what like best."

"Really?" Shelby asked as she looked back up.

"Why not?"

"Well, two meals are way too much... and kind of expensive, no offense."

"It'll be on the house, don't worry about it!"

"Are you sure?"

"Of course, I am." Ally smiled. "I'll even get Ivy to prepare it."

"Is Ivy your top chef?"

"That and my wife."

Shelby wasn't sure why, but when she learned Ally was married, she felt a pang in her heart. She was never really attracted to a woman before, and she wasn't sure if what she felt for Ally was just one of those friend-crushes, but it sure did feel different to her.

"That would be nice," she said with a smile.

"Okay, I'll be right back." Ally said before getting up. She walked toward the kitchen, but before entering, she looked back. "What do you want to drink?"

"Water is fine."

"I'll bring you some wine." Ally said before disappearing behind the kitchen door.

Shelby shook her head with a small laugh. She didn't get the chance to tell Ally she couldn't drink but thought maybe just a taste wouldn't hurt. As she waited, she grabbed her phone to see she got a text from her old manager.

**_Mandy_ ** **_: Just letting you know, some woman named Elizabeth called. She asked if you were a good person to work with_ **

**_Shelby: I'm hoping to get a job at her studio. What did you so?_ **

**_Mandy_ ** **_: Well, of course, I told her you were amazing when you were here. She_ ** **_asked_ ** **_what you were like as a boss, and I told her you were the best boss anyone could have_ **

**_Shelby: Thank you so much, Mandy_ **

**_Mandy_ ** **_: You're welcome. Good luck, and say hi to Marie for me_ **

**_Shelby: Will do_ **

"Here you go," Shelby heard and looked up to see a glass of red wine in front of her and Ally across from her.

"Thank you, but I really can't have any. I have to pick up my daughter after this." Shelby said hesitantly.

"Oh, God. I'm so sorry. Let me go get you that water then." Ally said as she grabbed the glass. "Would you want it to-go?"

"Sure," Shelby said with a small smile.

Ally came back soon with a glass of water and a whole bottle of wine. "Here you go."

"Oh, you didn't have to get me a whole bottle."

"It's okay, really. I don't mind. This one is my favorite, so I'm sure you'll enjoy it." Ally said with a smile.

"I love any red wine," Shelby said softly.

"Me too, honestly. The burger should be out in a minute, and then the steak." Ally informed the other woman.

"Okay," she nodded softly.

"So, what do you think of the town so far?"

"It seems great."

"Do you have a job here?"

"I just turned in an application at the yoga studio on Fannin."

"I've heard great things about that place." Ally said.

"The Google reviews seemed that way. It's the only place I've applied to so far." Shelby explained.

"Well, if it doesn't work out, we're always accepting."

"Oh, I wouldn't be a very good waitress, but thank you." Shelby smiled softly.

"There's more than just waitressing. We have bartenders, chefs, and I need an assistant, or I'll have to find a nanny for our son." Ally explained.

Shelby felt a pang again. She knew the struggles of having too much work and not enough time for your child. "You have a son?" she asked with a small smile.

"Yes. His name is Ozymandias, but everyone calls him Oz or Ozzy." Ally said with a smile. "You have a daughter?"

Shelby nodded with a small smile. "Yeah. Her name is Marie, she's almost two."

Ally smiled brightly. "I remember when Ozzy was two. We were trying to potty train him, and it was a wreck. I suppose it's easier with girls."

"That's what I've been told." Shelby chuckled. "It's getting easier now that she's telling me when she needs to go other than just sitting there staring at me."

"Ozzy did that too!" Ally laughed. "It's so damn frustrating."

"It really is," Shelby said.

The kitchen door opened up, and a blonde-haired woman walked out with a small platter with a burger and some fries. She set it on the table while smiling.

"This is Ivy." Ally told Shelby. "This is Shelby, the woman I told you about."

"A new face in town is always great." Ivy smiled. "It's great to meet you."

"You too, thank you both so much for this."

"You're welcome," they said in unison.

"Alright, I've got to get back. See you later." Ivy said before pecking Ally's lips and walked back to the kitchen.

Shelby looked down at her food and felt her stomach growl. She took a knife from the silverware set and cut the burger in half before taking a bite. She wiped her mouth after swallowing. "This is incredible," she said with a smile.

"Great!" Ally grinned.

"Do you guys cut your own meat?"

"We do."

"Do you cook as well?" Shelby asked before taking another bite.

"No, that's all Ivy. I stick to the books and accounting. I can't stand the sight of blood, so I hardly ever to in the kitchen, unless it's before prep, or for someone special." Ally explained.

"I know what you mean." Shelby nodded. "I used to be vegan."

"What happened?"

"Well," she chuckled bitterly to wipe her hands clean with the napkin. "After recuperating at the hospital and a blood transfusion, I was diagnosed with anemia, and I was told that I basically had to eat meat to replenish the iron that I needed because supplements weren't enough." She explained. She was slightly shocked that she found it so easy to talk to Ally about these things, things she hadn't really told or talked about with anyone else.

"I'm sorry about that. It must have been incredibly stressful to go through all of that."

"Yeah..." she nodded before grabbing a few of the fries. "God, these are great too."

"They are," Ally nodded with a smile.

"I can't imagine anything else being better than this."

"Then the steak will blow your mind."

Not long after, a waitress came over to the table with the steak with potatoes and onions. Shelby took the first bite and hummed again. "God, I don't think I'll be able to eat anywhere else." She laughed. "I'm sure you hear that a lot."

"We do, but I'm thrilled every time." Ally said.

"I can't decide which is better."

"Either way, you can take what you can't finish home with you."

"Thank you, really."

"Of course! Take is as a welcome to town."

"Okay," Shelby smiled shyly. "Thank you again."

"You're welcome. I know how hard it can be to relocate."

"You do?"

"Yes, about fifteen years ago, Ivy and I moved here from New York, and it was rough for the both of us." Ally explained.

"It was hard on Matt and me when we moved too, so I understand."

"That was your husband, right?"

"Yeah, well... ex." Shelby shrugged before eating more.

"You two got a divorce?" Ally asked. "Sorry... that's none of my business."

"It's okay," she said. "It was in the works before the second part of the show was filmed."

"You know, you don't seem like you did on there." Ally said.

"It was highly edited... Sydney was an asshole and made it seem as if we all hated each other, and after the police found everything his team made it just as he would have."

"They sure did make it seem that way. Audrey seemed the worse though."

Shelby shrugged again. "She wasn't the worst, but... not the best either."

"Do you mind me asking if it was weird? I mean, having to see yourself played by someone else?"

"I don't mind. And it was extremely weird."

"Has anyone else said anything?" Ally asked.

"No, you were one of the first people I've actually spoken to besides the movers and the people at the daycare where Marie goes," Shelby explained. "It's why I dyed my hair, and since I did that and changed my name, no one else has seemed to realize."

"What did you change it to?"

"My maiden name, Darling."

"Shelby Darling." Ally said. "I like that."

Shelby loved the sound of her name from the other woman's lips. "Thank you."

"Baby, you need to go pick up Oz!" Ivy yelled from the kitchen door.

Ally looked down at her watch. "Shit, sorry... I need to go."

"You're fine," Shelby said softly. "I should probably get going too."

"I'll send one of the waitresses over with a box." Ally said as she stood up. "See you around?"

"Defiantly." Shelby smiled.


End file.
